My weaknesses. As it seems.

The year of 2009 has been the worse of my life, so far at least. I expressed myself to a friend, just for the sake of expressing; never thought it would cause that person to have pity on me.

My classmates dislike me, or hate me for that matter, cuz im not productive. None wants me in their group. I am rejected. Now the last thing i need right now is pity. Maybe i've been having self pity for the past, 5 months?

It's so hard to move on, it's not as easy as it sounds, i'm scared and afraid. It's not that easy when people say you cant make anymore mistakes. Humans dont make mistakes on purpose. It is a mistake. I'm still in this hole. And no matter how much tear dries up, its not gonna change anything. Some people say they got my back. I dont feel supported at all. I need people who believe in me and would stand by for me. Throughout 2009, all i've dealt with was loneliness, and with loneliness, dealing with the things i've had to deal with.

Sulk, how sad.

The emo boy

I will have my grammar well rehearsed

If you ever needed to speak before a king, would you have your speech rehearsed?

Or, one would have their hearts certain and sure of the things they utter before the king. They'd do and say the right things and the ones who are true to their lord would do it gladly, with a joyful heart. Have we taken for granted, our lord who serves us so fervently and so fervent that he'd give anything to claim us and call us his people. Has he been around for too long, too close that he calls us friend, brother or sister that we forgot our true identity? Of course we did. Our ancestors did. Do we no longer need to have our speech rehearsed or actions considered before coming before him? Whatever we do today, even the little things, things we say and do- school, career, relationships and the very things we enjoy best, have you ever wondered where it came from? I hope we all do it right (:

Set our hearts, purpose and passion right before our Lord and King. At the end of the day, He'd still be a God who would wash our feet like Jesus did with the 12, who are only examples of what He'd do and say to us.

Another child of God and brother of yours,

kevin.

0.1

Not taken into account.
He's only putting into the account of others.


A documentary project based on the underground music scene ought to be done by tomorrow. And not one shot has yet been taken. This will only come to two things:

1. Submit two weeks late.
2. I'd get a zero, and then i'd have to do the project all over again next year.


If that happens, my life is gonna reap some hell fruits again. It's reapin already, alright; not even boost can help now. Just gotta drive, baby. Will definitely post some of my work up here :D Oh hey on the brightey, will be doing alot of acoustic stuff along with some alternative hype in the new songs im coming out with. A Fine Frenzy and Taking Back Sunday helped out so much.

Valeria Poxleitner (:

Oh and since this is my very first post on my blog (: lemme tell you guys what's it all about. Simple, it's gonna be about my music, my work (short films, music vids, documentaries, art), my significant stuff that's significant enough that you wont waste your preecioouus time reading it, revelations from God and the life with Him that i should share with many. And yeah, im a Christian. Live, Love, Die for Christ.

Viva la Revolucion!

Hoping for the best,

kevin.